Best First Date Conversation Starters

Do you recall the last date you went on? Did you have enough to talk about? Did the conversation ever go dead and all your mind could focus on was, “what do I say next?” We have all had those awkward moments.

I went on a date with a guy who slid into my Instagram DM’s. I barely knew him, but I knew it had taken him a lot of courage to ask me out. So, I said yes because I have been told that you never know you aren’t interested until you try it out. So why not try it out? Well, I knew pretty quickly I wasn’t super interested. The chemistry wasn’t there, and the conversation seemed forced.

This post is meant to get us out of these awkward moments when you don’t know what to say or ask. Whether you were in this situation last night, last year, or now. Here is to change and become a professional First Date conversation starter. We have revealed eight first-date conversation ideas. These conversation topics will improve the quality of your first date and amplify your chances for a second date.

1. Where are you from?

Little do you know how much of the things you hold dear to your heart backtrack to where you are from. This place is a big part of who you are, and there is no point in hiding that. It will help you bond with your date as you share stories and experiences from your hometowns that have made you who you are today.

2. Music Preferences

Music is critical today because it tells a lot about a person’s personality. Dr. David Greenberg, a psychologist from Cambridge University, said, “People who are high on empathy may prefer a certain type of music compared to people who are more systematic.” Maybe your date loves country music because he grew up on acres of land in the middle of nowhere which reminds him of the good old days. You may even discover that you both listen to the same artist. Discussing music preferences helps you bond and often gives you new songs to jam out to. It is a win-win situation.

3. Your life goals and dreams

Where do you see yourself in 2 years? How about in 10 years? Life is full of important questions to discuss with someone you’re interested in, especially if you can see a future with this person. Talking about your goals, hopes, and desires is a great way to get to know someone on a deeper level and know if you would be compatible with them. Share goals you have for all aspects of your life. Your dream profession, spiritual, fitness, family, intellectual. Don’t be timid in sharing your aspirations; people will appreciate your enthusiasm and love for life.

4. Do you prefer the mountains or the beach?

Mountain and beach people are two entirely different breeds. Thus, this information will tell you a lot about a person. Researchers have found that extroverts usually prefer the beach, whereas introverts prefer the mountains.

5. What is your favorite way to stay active?

Staying active in the world today is crucial, but there are many different ways to do it. Some people are big into running, whereas others are more into weightlifting. There are no wrong ways to be active, but it is nice to know how much this potential partner values fitness and what they do to keep it up.

6. Stay on the edge of your seat

If small talk isn’t your forte, get innovative with your questions. This way, you can find out more about them without the conversation feeling too basic or forced. Remember that these questions will lead you to know them better, for good and bad. Here are our top picks:

✰How do you spend your free time?

✰What are three things on your bucket list?

✰If you could go back in time and relive a day of your life, What day would it be?

✰ What takes your breath away?

✰What makes you laugh the hardest?

✰What little things make your day better?

✰If you could give me a tour of your hometown, where would you take me first?

7. Diving Deep

If the conversation advances and you feel safe, it is time to share the things that truly set you apart from any other girl or guy. It is time to dive into your core values, opinions, and beliefs. You don’t have to agree on every topic. It is vital to see different viewpoints; opposites frequently attract because they balance out. But, it is ideal that you share similar views on these challenging topics. It could be an obstacle if you don’t, but it all depends on how highly you value your morals and standards.

Here is a list of deep discussion topics:

✰ How do you feel about social media and technology?

✰ What is success to you?

✰ Who are the most special people in your life?

✰What’s something you’re proud of?

✰ Do you have a good relationship with your siblings and parents?

✰What are your political stances?

✰Would you consider yourself a religious person?

8. Know When to Be Done

Sadly, Even the best first-date conversation topics won’t always lead to a happily ever after. Sometimes, the chemistry isn’t there. Call it a night if things aren’t going well and it’s awkward, no matter what questions you bring to the table. You can escape the evening with something along the lines of, “I didn’t realize how late it was, I better get going,” Or “I promised my roommate I would help with her homework, so I should be heading back.”

On the other hand, if the date is going well, schedule the next date then and there. People’s schedules fill up so quickly. If you are genuinely interested in going out with this person again, it is best to say something like, “What is the rest of your week looking like?” “What are your plans this weekend?” Or bring up something you discussed on the date; it could be a similar interest or something one of you has to try. For example, maybe through the conversation, you discovered that you both love pickleball. So you could say, “When are we playing Pickleball?”


Above All, it is important to remember that there is no such thing as a bad date. Every dating experience, whether it is for better or for worse, expands your horizons. It opens your eyes to what you are truly looking for in a significant other and leaves you with a funny story to tell. Go on all the dates; you miss one hundred percent of the shots you don’t take.

Up next: How to have Multiple Dates in One Day

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